lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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