Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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