You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
