You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize