last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize