the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
