Whoa Z and x make the same sound
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
