She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
