What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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