Pappa wants mamma naked
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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