YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Randomize
