if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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