I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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