True but thats because hes a fetus.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
