I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
She told me I should be a condom model.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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