Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
