What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
