names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
