I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
