it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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