don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
