If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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