Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
