thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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