its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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