i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
