They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
