What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
