32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
