I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Randomize
