fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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