im about as happy as oj after his trial
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize