I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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