that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
