dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
