is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
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