i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
