shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
