Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I just found puke in my bra..
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
