So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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