I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
