Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
do herpes really smell.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
pray to the hookup gods
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
