Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
