I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
