What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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