I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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