somebody snuck up and got me drunk
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I'm really busy with my period
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