Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
