awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
