Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
