whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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